Life of A Freaking Fantastic Fangirl

Some memories play out so vividly in your head, like it was just a few minutes ago that that thing occurred, But it's strange to think that those memories happened a year ago. It's funny how things can change in a year, how someone you never thought you'd be friends with end up being your friend and more.  I get those random flashbacks and the memories are so real, so vivid and I can recall almost every detail. It's all really just random memories; the first time I ever heard 'Give Me Love' and found it weird then I loved it but now I can't listen to it without going through a montage of memories, the first few weeks of our convos, those night shifts when it was just the two of us.  They just pop up when I least expect them and I can't seem to switch them off. I wish I could forget it all, erase all the memories then I wouldn't hurt so much. I can't seem to get you off my mind because every time I try to move, a tiny part of me bumps into ...

1 more shift before Seoul!  Cause I'm on mc today heh. Legit sick with fever the previous night. It was like my fourth fever and it's not even half a year. Tsktsk. I think my body's rebelling against waking up at 4am every few days lol.  Found out my kakak Tas is only going to be back in September. Super pissed when I found out because I was so excited for her return. NOW I HAVE TO WAIT ANOTHER 3 MORE MONTHS. Wadafuq seriously.  K bye. 

Montigo was fun fun fun. Too short though, should go longer next time. Basically we ate, lepak, swam and talked cock. Their service is excellent though and we enjoyed ourselves thoroughly. Will definitely go again. Too bad it was cloudy and rainy if not it would have definitely been better. Waking up and seeing the low tide was kinda shocking cause it looked like the front part of the resort was bulldozed lol.  The buggy rides were fun but the massage hurt when they rubbed at my knots. We were all complaining of back ache after that hahaha. This was defo fun and we should defo do more vacations together. Go jer sis.  Seoul next week and our itinerary is not done. DUO YOLO. I'll probably pack a day before or something. k bye 

I'm seriously done with SM. Lol. Some days I'm ok with it but most of the time, I'm just done with it. It's tiring. Being the stuck up snob I am, I don't talk to people and sometimes I can go through an entire day without talking to anyone. I'm looking forward to a mini getaway to Batam next month before the big one; Seoul in June! Excited is an understatement. Planning the itinerary is tiring because there's so many things to do and having to plan when and where and how is boring. I just wanna go there already. Will be gone for almost 2 weeks from work which is totally fun. I need a break man, like seriously. --- I think time... Time doesn't really heal but it makes it just a bit better and let's you forget. You have to heal yourself. I don't know how long it'll take me to really let go of you. It might be never and that's a scary thing. To think that someone can be so permanent in your life. Even if we never see each other for y...

I think I'm believing in the saying that everything happens for a reason. Even if I can't figure it out at that time and I'm not willing to accept it, everything happens for a reason. I've been wondering why you happened. Why did you come into my life when fate had other plans for us. After too long of back and forths and pondering, I finally think I know why. Maybe. I wanted you for so long. So freaking long. You hit me like a truck and awakened feelings I didn't know I had. Well, now I wish I didn't have. See, the first day I met you, I felt a... Connection? Spark? Idk. I just felt something different about our encounter. I've honestly never felt that way before but I hope I get to experience it again. That day was my birthday and I think that was God's gift to me. Then I became a stalker. HAHAHA. I really was but it was just for fun cause I knew we'd never be friends. But looking back, all those random glances... Maybe you felt that spark ...

I swear times passes by too fast when you're not paying attention. Now that I'm in SM, it seems to pass by faster somehow. Oh, how is SM. I can't say I enjoy it but I can't say I hate it too. It's... OK. The morning shifts are tiring af and I have to fight the inevitable sleepiness which is like night shift sleepiness except you don't get to go home at 8am. Double mornings are worse. I'm like a zombie I swear. Even people can see that I'm tired lolz. Working with Alpha is great actually. I used to scoff when people said Alpha was better but after working with them, they're kinda chill and they give you tangos and you don't have to clear motors at the field counter. I feel touched when the team people know that I'm new to SM when my own team doesn't even know I'm in the same team as them /single tear rolls down my cheek Still haven't really clicked with the SM people. Well, I'm awkward so I guess maybe I'll be friends...